March 6

Phuket is Thailand’s largest island and 2nd smallest province. It is our only stop in Thailand….which is OK. We like Thailand, but favor the northern part of the country. Our last ship-stop was at a port with access to Bangkok, but it required a 2 hour bus trip both ways. Then, the city was so crowded that it was difficult to do much. Our stop this time found us in Patong Harbor. While we had stopped here before and enjoyed our massages, I thought I’d check the web to get some commentary. I found a number of comments:

sleazy;

the most illegal sex tourism;

people seem to lose their moral compass; 

aggressive taxi mafia and unfriendly tuk tuk drivers;

drunk tourists;

go go bars and prostitution;

tourist trap;

poor choice of luxury hotels…most 1 or 2 stars;

don’t be surprised to see unacceptable behavior at swimming pools,lobbies, bars and restaurants;

overdeveloped and too commercialized;

charm gets old quickly;

staying not a good idea…not family friendly;   and, the winner;

too avoid the wastewater treatment fee, many households discharge wastewater (sewage) untreated into canals and the sea  Sea water exceeds acceptable limits for fecal coliform and enterococcus. (I thought Karla could still snorkel, but she would have to be looking for “floaters” rather than fish.)

That sounded pretty good.  So we arranged an island tour. We had a very good guide who led us to 2 temples and a cashew factory. Very nice scenery on the way. Karla commented that it might be fun to come back if it weren’t so hot (90-95). I’m getting about as many temples as I need, but they were nice. While Karla toured them with more vigor, I frequented the numerous small shops that spring up around all tourist sites. It’s hard to get enough colorful $5-6 dollar shirts. The cashew “factory”  featured women shelling the cashews by hand, one at a time. After that brief look, we were able to enter the huge sales area and buy all kinds of products.

 

Once we returned to Patong, we went searching for a massage place. There were 5-6 on every block, it seemed, so the search was not difficult. We weren’t too particular, but there were one or two criteria. The signs on the door frequently said “no sex” and we wanted one of those. The second variable was more difficult. There are lots of “Lady Boys” who are men dressed as attractive women. (The language even has a 3rd gender referring to Lady Boys.) I was partial to having a woman masseuse, as was Karla. Karla got a whole body massage which included her person walking on her back. I got a back massage. Both were good….easily worth the $10 a piece. With such a great price, Karla could have gone snorkeling, but chose not to.

This entry shouldn’t end without a brief historical note on Phuket. How was it named?  Students of English sailing history might recognize the name Percival Hightower. As a sea captain he admired the work of predecessors in establishing trading centers in Singapore and Penang.  He reasoned that moving north and west from those posts he might find an island rich with spices. He was fortunate to anchor near what is now Phuket. He dispatched a crew to search the island for spices while he and his cartographer set about charting his discovery. His disappointed spice crew returned with a negative finding about the time the cartographer was asking Hightower what to call the island. His response to the exploratory crew was “Fuck It” He was obviously disappointed. The cartographer, thinking the captain was speaking to him, recorded the name, but thought it would be best to substitute PH for F to protect his captain’s future reputation. And, there you have it.